Love.. Can happen twice.

Hey, I am Rishabh! You might not know me yet, but I have a story to tell you. Many of you might even relate to it. I am the side cornered guy; you know who doesn’t like to be around many people and gain attention from a thousand people. My friends, yeah only two of the honest ones say that I am very good at dancing. It’s been once or twice I took part in dance competition in my college but that was it.

But that day, someone who I really care about said, “c’mon Rishabh, you really dance well! Better than anyone else in our whole batch, you should continue doing that!”. And she slapped her palm over my arm. Yeah, she is Maya, my friend well I like her more than that but I never got a chance to tell her that. You know what happens when you let those feelings get in the way and your friendship is ruined!

It is unusual, but we have been friends since a decade now, basically she has been there with me since I was 10 and now, I am going to turn 20, which makes half of it. She came to live beside my house, we are neighbors since then. Sometimes I look at her, and I feel I am the lady and she is the man.

You know why? She is so cool, hangs out with so many guys, goes to parties, dresses like a tom boy and smart unlike me who hardly makes any friends. She is also very famous in our college, she sings, leads and does a lot of promotional stuff because I guess she is very good at talking.

Never mind, this story is about me so let’s cut her description a little less. Since childhood, I have seen my mom and dad getting on and off about their relationship, don’t get me wrong they are not divorced but sometimes I feel if they had, they would be happier. Apart from dancing, I also like to listen to music — you should because good dance comes from good music eh?

Maya has made me a better person than who I was previously. We were very anxious at class 10th that will we get to the same school or not? No matter how childish this sounds, someone familiar always make things comfortable. It happened, we studied together in the same school after that and then college.

Although we had different subjects to choose from, I always tried to meet her at least once in college.

My friend Kunal keeps on whining about this, “it’s been 5 years man, why don’t you just tell her yet? Even we haven’t been friends for so long!”

“You don’t understand, do you? I can’t, it will ruin everything mahn!”

“you are afraid to lose her?”

“what if she says a no? what then, it will be awkward and I will lose her as a friend!”.

“you’re a coward that’s it!”. He rushed from class that day.

Well how do I make him understand? It is hard to do what he wants me to do. Maybe I really don’t have the courage!

Let me tell you a tale, once I was hanging out with Maya and my friends Kunal and Dev. We were ordering coffee for everyone but Maya interrupted, “make 3 coffees and one green tea!”.

Kunal sighs, “Oh yes, it is a Saturday and yeh mahashay toh aaj diet pe hai!”.

I laughed, Maya said, “Yeah! I don’t understand how dieting works if you are going to eat so much in 2 days”.

“C’mon Maya, I work out to reduce that! I also dance, and thanks for remembering my diet day!”.

She pulls my cheek softly, “how can I forget it buddhu!”.

Dev chuckles, “we might forget his diet, but you never fail to forget!”.

You know in moments like these, you understand how important you are in someone’s life, but maybe I was wrong. Maybe because we have been with each other for so long, we just know things.

I remember the time when I bought her a dress for birthday, she is not fond of such things but still accepted it and kissed on my cheek, “you’re such a sweetheart do you know that?”.

“Yeah I am, and you keep making me your driver for birthdays, can’t I have just one single birthday with you when you don’t have your friends, or should I say boyfriends around, only you and me?”.

“you’re my driver, aren’t you? where will I get the big car you have? And mom trusts you that you will keep me safe even if I pass out!”.

“I deserve a private birthday with you!”. I made a puppy face.

She pulled my cheeks, “Ok! Next year pakka! Done deal?”, she forwards her palm

We shake hands, “done deal!”.

Yes, and in just a week her birthday comes again, what am I gonna do? Should I finally propose her?

Well, all the stories I have heard of being in love and friendships, such stories always have a bad ending.

I am in college now, still clueless whether I will go to finance our start my own business, Did I say? I am doing BBA actually and it will take two more years before I finally finish with my studies. My dad had a business startup at that age, and here I am confused what to do next?

Still, I feel privileged that I have so many options to even think off, out their people are living in just daily wages. In all this chaos you might think my life only revolves around Maya, it was true certain point, I really like her and I hate it when she hangs out with other boys. Let me narrate you a story when she went partying with those boys. It was a hell of a night; she hardly goes to party except her birthdays but that day she had a celebration. I wasn’t even aware of this one.

I get a call late night, maybe around 12 or 12.30, it was Maya, I was wondering why was she calling me,

“Rishabh, I really want you to come and pick me! Please!!”, she sounded drunk and in a major chaos.

“wait, where are you?”

“I am at the club of DG Lines, can you pick me please?”

“ok, hold on I am coming!”

I sneaked out of my home, DG lines was 15 minutes from my place, Mumbai never seemed so lonely as it was that night! I went to the club and I see so many people gathering. The entrance was small and when I went inside, I saw the club lights in red, with an overhead balcony space and a bar at right.

I was worried for Maya so much. I see her coming from my right

“come on! Let’s go!”

“what the hell is happening? Where are your friends?”

“can we just leave from here first?” she stumbled, I held her

“ok c’mon get in the car!”.

She was not in her senses, I realized that. I was confused what was going on, “can you now tell me what was happening there?”

“so one of my friend’s friend had a fight with some random person at the bar, maybe a challenge or something, they got drunk or whatever and started an intense fight and I guess he had a gun and then people called the police and rest of my friends just left”

“what are you talking about? Guns, police, are you sure? And why did your friends leave you?”

“yeah yeah I am! But I would be in great misery if you didn’t come! And my friends are bunch of douchebags!! My parents really don’t know about it and I was thinking maybe I could stay at your place?”

“what? Are you insane Maya? C’mon how can I sneak you in to my house?”

“yeah, that would be a problem, right? I know a place where we can go!”

I don’t know what will I tell to my parents if they find out about this! I follow her lead. It was an abandoned garage, with a small cabin. It was so cozy, and a secret space, she held my hand and took me inside.

“isn’t this beautiful?”

It was a tiny cabin with all the stuff stuck to the walls that she loves and a bed where only she could fit.

“what is this place?”

“this is my family’s old garage, and this is my safe space, I didn’t show you this place before because I don’t like sharing it with anyone, I come here sometimes when I want to be alone! And I always have the key!”

It felt she was finally coming back to her senses. She sat on the bed and said, “it’s 12am already, I am sorry I didn’t wish you before, but happy birthday! And happy anniversary to our friendship, it has been 10 years!”. I sat beside and hugged her, “thank you! same to you”.

She chuckled and went to sleep in my arms, I took support and went to sleep.

Well, that was a beautiful night, nothing important happened but those little moments will always stay with me. I prepared a birthday surprise for her, and I hope this time she doesn’t ditch me. I called her in the same garage I was talking about.

“Rishabh, this is gorgeous!” she said, I didn’t do much, just a few balloons and a “HAPPY BIRTHDAY” décor in the middle of it.

“did you like it?” I asked.

“yes! It is fabulous”, she hugged me.

“also, I have something else too planned for tonight”.

“What?”

“let’s cut the cake first?”

I bought the cake with a crackling candle on top of it, she loved black forest cakes, it was a heart — shaped one, she was confused, “do I think what it is, is actually happening?”.

“aah maybe, depends on what you’re thinking!”.

I light the crackling candle and she clapped and jumped in air; how beautiful did she look. She cut the cake and we fed the little pieces to each other.

I gave her a locket, my heart was thumping loud, I am sure she could listen to it. I was anxious to what I was going to say. With shaking hands, I held her hand,

“I have a confession to make, I love you, since a few years now. I know this might just blow up our relationship but I couldn’t keep it a secret anymore. Will you…..”

“be your girlfriend? Awwwh Rishabh, look I am sorry but it is not that, I really love you too but not that way if you get it? And I really don’t want this jeopardized, all of this is really sweet of you! can we still be friends?”

I knew something like this would happen, didn’t I? but I still had hope, well I will get on with her.

“oh, I don’t know what to say, really! But yes, we will be friends forever, I can’t afford to lose that!”. I hugged her tight.

There was a jolt of pain in my heart. I still can’t forget it. For weeks I ignored her and absorbed myself into music and dance. It felt as if I lost the entirety of life, that it had no meaning, I had no importance.

But a few years later, now when I look back, I feel things happened for good, she might have been my first love but not the last. I did find the right person who proposed me this time, she is fearless and I think she is the one. Well that is a tale for some other day but now I realize, things do go downhill for your firsts, how can you be perfect on all your firsts? It is just a lie.

Our experiences make us better than who we are, I liked to be alone in most of my time, but even I wanted to be loved, I never thought I would have my perfect love story too, since what happened with Maya but it did and I am thankful for that.